David Hsieh's Post

My good friend David posted this on his blog a month ago or so and I just read it. It really spoke so much truth to me, so I am sharing it with you now. :)


Cleanin' House
I cringe at who I am. Or, rather, who I was.Sometimes. Okay, more than sometimes. But not all the time.If someone were to ask me, "David, how have you seen God at work in your life?" Knowing me, I might fumble in my thoughts for a few seconds to try to come up with some deep, theological 'Look-at-me-I'm-holy' answer. But really, what would be the best answer? I mean, how have I seen God working in my life? Because, really, if I'm pretty much at the same place I was nine years ago or, maybe, even worse off than I was nine years ago as a person, you gotta start questioning whether there's really anything to all this, or if it's really, to borrow from the IU Secular Alliance's terminology, 'Wishful thinking.'That really burns me, by the way.So, what would be the best answer to all this? How has God been working in my life?Back up. Has God been working in my life?Yes.Okay. How?I guess this is one of those of those rare moments when it might be helpful to be a reality TV star. Because my answer would simply be, "Look at who I was, and look at who I'm becoming." NOT, "Look at who I am." I mean, the way I've really looked at it, and it's really helped my understanding of my sanctification, which really, is just another Christian-y term for growing closer to Christ's character. The way I look at it is kind of like a monkey in a house.What?Yeah, a monkey in a house. Let's say you have a chimpanzee, and he's let loose in your house. He's left alone to his own devices for, let's say a month. If you were to come into the house and look around after a month, what would you find? Well, a mess. Shattered mirrors, overturned furniture, feces everywhere, it would be a pit. Well, say you kick the chimp out and the master of the house returns. Does that fix all the problems? Not at all. Everything's still in shambles. But little by little, bit by bit, the house is restored to the way it was supposed to be. It's a mess, still, but at least the monkey's not in control anymore. Sometimes you'll open a door and find that the mess goes far deeper and is spread much further than you thought. But the house is never going to be dirtier than the first moment after the monkey's been ditched.Replace monkey with Satan. Replace the house with yourself. Or your life.And the master of the house?He's God.So what about me? What about David Hsieh? Well, I'm still very much a wrecked home. A wrecked home with a nicely mowed yard and some pretty trees out front, I suppose. I grew up in a pretty wealthy socioeconomic background. I've never had any material needs unmet. I don't have any sort of criminal history, not even so much as a speeding ticket. I had the chance to attend one of the best K-12 education programs in the country, and now I'm at college. I'm a Christian. I have been for 9 years, goin' on 10, as of December 17th of this year. I have tremendous community in my life, people who support me and encourage me, who are ready to call me out when I need to be called out. I'm a Bible study leader, and oftentimes my favorite day of the week is Tuesdays when we get to mutually encourage and challenge each other toward a greater understanding and reflection of God. I'm heading up Men's Ministry with Cru at IU, a position I certainly didn't expect at the beginning of the year, and I'm excited about the plans we have for the guys here. I think we're going to do a lot of new things, ambitious things, but if God enters into with us, I think some real good happen here. I've been given the chance to disciple two solid, Christ-centered guys with a real passion for growth, accountability, and evangelism. A pretty nicely mowed yard. A front porch with a swing. A two-car garage with a red bike hanging out on the driveway.But open the front door, step through the threshold and what do you see? Maybe some semblance of order, but certainly not what should be expected from all outside appearances. Muddy shoes, perhaps, lying on the carpet, a few lightbulbs burnt out. The fire in the hearth isn't really a fire, but one of those fake TV screen fires that you see. The dog hasn't been washed in a while. My problems with discipline are well-documented. Any given afternoon, you might find me on facebook or watching TV. Maybe playing video games. Any given night at 12:30am, you'll find doing homework. Studying. I'm a man with problems in consistency. One week, God is the center. I'm finding time for him before all other things, seeking his will in my life and my day-to-day interactions. The next, I'm so bogged down in homework that I hardly a give a thought to him, except the time I spend preparing for Bible study. I miss classes for no good reason. (I slept too late is not a good reason when your first class of the day begins at 11:15am). I divide people into categories of "Worth my time," "not worth my time," and "definitely worth my time, but conversation would be awkward." Because of my lack of discipline, I wonder why I have no time to take of care of my body. There are cobwebs in the corners. The carpet is noticeably threadbare. The couches are missing their springs. More than a few lightbulbs are burnt out.A few more steps and you realize the problems run deeper than you thought. The sink is full of dirty dishes. The toilet's stopped up (and has been for some time). Cockroaches and rats have established free reign over their dominion, while spiders keep the peace. The smell is almost overpowering. Sexual impurity is a constant problem. Some days it's worse than others, but it's never lurking far away. And despite my best efforts to stay alert, it's an opportunistic predator, always pouncing when I least expect it, savaging my heart with twin fangs of Shame and Disgrace. Sloth is its hunting partner, Boredom its faithful hound. I find myself righteous based on the works I do and the religious titles I can place on myself. "Bible Study Leader" tells me that men look up to me and hang on the words I speak. "Discipler" tells me that my lifestyle will make others admire me. "Went on Project" says that I have an undergone an experience that makes me holier than others and, therefore, my vision is clearer than theirs. "Christian" tells me that, on my own strength, I refuse to bow to the pressures of this world. My works make me holy. "Humble" says that I need not pay attention to pride. And pride whispers that I need not pay attention to sin. The ceiling is leaking. Pipes have burst. Though the refrigerator is tied shut, a pungent and none-too-pleasant odor has managed to escape, not so strong as to send you running from the house, but just insidious enough to make the visit extremely uncomfortable.Only when you arrive in the basement does it become apparent how bad the problems are. termites have whittled the foundations to nothing. I don't trust God. I don't rest in his promises. I don't believe that he wants the best for me. I refuse to give up to him my classes, my career, my friends, my resentment, my future wife, my ministry.My sin.When he chooses to show me how in control he is (and how I am not), instead of standing in awe of his sovereignty, I pout and curse him. I sulk in self-gratifying self-pity. I shout and stomp and cry and shake my fist at the the Lord of the Universe, because I believe myself entitled. Because I find myself worthy.The water is higher now. It's hard to breathe. The power has finally failed, the lightbulbs not even flickering anymore, as if the effort required to do even that was too painful to bear. The house is listing heavily to one side, tired of trying to stand up straight for the neighbors to see. The smudged windows burst like rotting fruit, and the house collapses in on itself, seemingly imploding from all directions.And then stops. And there are sounds. Sounds of life.In the basement. A single man is braced against the wall. As he strains against the weight, it looks like he's winning. The timbers, weakened and full of termites, have found new purpose. He pushes and the rough wood obeys.In the basement. The man makes the trek from flooded cellar to the front yard, carrying buckets in each callused hand. Two at a time. Two at a time. Two at a time. Slowly the waters recede.In the basement. The man lays thick beams of cedar on the drying floor. The crossbeams are fresh, still full of life. His carpenter's muscles pound thick iron nails into the wood and then move deftly to tie it together with thick, handwoven rope. The beams are raised into place against the water-stained concrete and the house groans in approval. They look strangely familiar.He moves from room to room, his eyes measuring the most minute of details. Nothing escapes his steady gaze. A shattered window. A broken toilet. A cracked cabinet. A smudged table. A spilled drink. A threadbare carpet. Some doors are still closed. Behind some of them, a fairly clean room curiously untouched. Others, breeding grounds for pestilence. Over long years, he restores it to its intended glory. In some places, he scrapes away the grime and mold. In others, he applies a fresh coat of paint. In others, he tears down and rebuilds, tediously perfecting each wall, each door, each pillar, and every corner.You see, he's not just repairing a house. He's restoring his home. And for this carpenter-king, the work won't be finished until this rotting shack is transformed into the temple-palace it was meant to be, with every surface and detail shining reverent praise to its maker. There may be many rooms yet unpure, and the work may yet continue for years (and most certainly will), the Master's craftsmanship and persevering spirit are unmistakable. This work will not go unfinished.And that is the Gospel to me. That the rotting shack of my life quite fit for the demons and shames of my sinful nature would be restored to a palace fit for the King. That an object of wrath could be brought to a place of mercy. That a slave might become a son. There may yet be much work to do, and it seems every new day opens a new door of my life painfully needy for its restorer, but the work he started will not go unfinished.

Philippians 3:12-14, "Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

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Spiritual Milk

Hebrews 5:11-6:2

"About this we have much to say, and it is hard to explain, since you have become dull of hearing. ¹²For though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you again the basic principles of the oracles of God. You need
milk, not solid food, ¹³for everyone who lives on milk is unskilled in the word of righteousness, since he is a child. ¹⁴But solid food is for the mature, for those who have their powers
of discernment trained by constant practice to distinguish good from evil. ¹Therefore let us leave the elementary doctrine of Christ and go on to maturity, not laying again a foundation of repentance from dead works and of faith toward God, ²and of instruction about washings, the laying on of hands, the resurrection of the dead, and eternal judgment."

It's really hard for me when I read things like this sometimes. I know that there are many differences between this person and me, but there are many similar qualities too… I have been feeling this way for about a year. I feel like I should know so much more than I do. I have been saved for eight years now. Eight years! And I feel like there are still so many teachings I don't understand. I feel like the past half year especially, I have just felt really stuck. I don't know where to learn anymore, and I don't know how to grow here. I am not blaming anyone for the fact that I don't feel I have grown much of this time. I just desire so much more than I am getting. I feel like I have so much milk, and the milk is so good! But I really am dying to be on solid food, and to have more of it! I just don't know where to get it Maybe I am too critical (probably true). I just want a body that can pour into me… so I can in turn do the same, and be a solid vessel for my Lord and my God.

My friends have been such a blessing to me since I have been here at IU. I have my Hobart kids, Heather, Smudde, Lis, and the boy team (aka like Matt, Al, Brae and David). Without them challenge me, I have no idea where I would be… but that just doesn't seem to be enough anymore. We are all in the same place. I want to be more than just challenged… I want to be poured into. Sometimes I think about staying an extra year in Bloomington, but I don't think that is going to be the case. I am not sure what I'm gonna do yet, but I know I need somewhere to grow. I feel like the point where I am at is almost like I have hit a glass ceiling here. I even feel like I might even be sliding a bit backwards. I hate that. Like HATE it.

The Lord is good, and the Lord is sovereign. I am where I am supposed to be. One of my favorite missionaries of all time, Jim Elliot, once said, "Where ever you are, be all there." I definitely feel like I struggle with that from time to time. Right now is a pretty prime example of that. I am ready to move on to a different stage of life. I am ready to grow, and I am ready to start serving in a different way. Praise the Lord, for He is good. Pretty soon, I am going to have to be making some very important decisions with my life that very well could affect my life forever… I am not afraid of making the wrong decision. I don't believe I can do that. I just want to honor the Lord what little I have to offer him Him… My life. Without Christ, I have nothing. I am nothing. But He loves me J And His mercies make me new every day. I just can't wait to start the new chapter of my life. Who knows where it will be, and who will be in it!? All I know is it is going to be an adventure!

I like Adventures J

Encouragement

I was reading Hebrews 3 today, and one of the verses I read really hit me... Vs 13 says,

"But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called 'today,' that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin."

I started thinking about our culture a lot, even our culture as Christians. So what does it mean to "exhort?" I found several definitions for this online. Most of which said the same thing. It is to urge, advise, admonish urgently, to encourage, recommend, or warn someone (more a combination of these things than an individual thing).



We don't do this very often in our culture. The Lord has blessed me very much in whom I am close with. I have two sisters, a brother-in-law, and a few very close friends who never cease in encouraging, advising, and admonishing me when it needs to be done. Sadly, I am aware that most people, including Christians, do not have friends or family who are strong in this at all. I see so many people who are "hardened by the deceitfulness of sin" simply because A) no one will exhort them or B) They refuse to listen to those who actually do exhort them. I think both are equally as sad. Why have we lost this in our culture? Why, as Christians, do we feel like this is something that invades people's privacy or violates their rights? I can't even count the number of times either I or someone I know has rebuked someone and had them get angry or they respond by asking to "stop judging them." Why?! Seriously!? Why would anyone ever not want to see they are walking in sin if they are a follower of Christ? How has this become acceptable? How has this become desirable to walk in ignorance?

As a result, believes become hard and they fall in to even more sin. How tragic... And as a result of having rebukes and exhortations refused, people stop exhorting each other, resulting in all the more hardening. These our our brothers and sisters! We are watching them slip away and we do nothing... out of fear.

I am not saying I am perfect, oh no, please do not misunderstand me. I am a wretched sinner all the same as you. I am selfish, proud, a manipulator, a gossip, a deceiver, an adulterer, and the list goes on. I am so sinful... but I want to be better so badly. My sin physically pains me sometimes. But the more I sin, the more grace I see. And in my weakness, He is my strength. I will probably never stop sinning while I am here on this earth, but I will do my best to recognize my need for Christ everyday, and to grow in holiness, so that people can see Christ through me, and they may in turn follow the one who as made me this way. The creation is called to reflect the Creator.

So, friends, please do not be afraid to exhort one another, as we are called to do. Do not let yourself be hardened to the deceitfulness of sin, and slip farther away from the one who has called you. The more you grow, the more you realize how little you really know. I am far from humble, but the lessons I am learning are definitely a huge help! And PLEASE, rebuke me. :) I need a good rebuking often. :P

Love,
Mel

I am so ready for this semester to be over... that is all I have to say

A Spirit of Power and Self-Discipline

It's definitely been a while since my last post. It's been quite a busy last few weeks with my Nephew, Joshua, being born, and making three trips back and fourth from Maryland in three weeks. And my life has just been a little chaotic and confusing as a whole the last three weeks anyway. Needless to say, blogging turned into a less necessary thing.

Even now, this is still not going to be very long, just a quick update on life. Aside from all of the confusion, I love what the Lord is doing in my life, and I definitely feel myself drawing nearer to Him. It's been a hard semester, but trials always bring forth fruit. Praise God for that. More and more I feel I just have a burning desire to grow back in discipline. I think I went through a stage towards the end of the year last year and into last summer that I felt like I had been acting really legalistically about all of the things I was doing, so I guess instead of changing my heart, I just stopped doing them. Not a good idea if any of you all were wondering. I don't even think my heart really was legalistic about it, and I think I just freaked out because I thought it was. The bible commands that we "discipline ourselves for the purpose of godliness."(1 Timothy 4:7- NASB) I need to get back in that habit. Christ commands "Be holy, as I am holy." (1 Peter 1:16) The more I am around people who knows God's Word, and who speak it, the more I feel like it is amazing how they have all the answers and I don't. There is a reason they seemingly know everything. Because they have the Word of God stored up in their heart, so they are ready for any battle. I could site scripture after scripture, though not from memory, about why it is important to know the Word, but I still so often don't read it the way I should. I have developed a lot of bad habits... But I the Lord is my Shepherd. I should have not fear, because my path is strait, and the Lord is teaching me so much right now. It is very humbling to know how much more I need to grow, and how much more I want to do. The Lord has given me the power of self-discipline (2 Timothy 1:7), I just need to use what He has given me through His Spirit.

Considering how difficult this past semester has been for me as a whole in pretty much every way, I almost feel like I am starting all the way over... and I think that is a good thing honestly. I just need to reevaluate a lot. But the Lord has me, and I am not afraid :) I am trusting in His sovereignty to work all things for my good and His glory. College is coming to a close and I have a lot of big decisions to make, but again, for the first time, I am not afraid. I am just ready to do it, haha. Where ever I go, whatever I do, whoever I do it with, the Lord is still my Rock. God is good, and in Him I will have joy. What a wonderful promise. What a wonderful Savior.

God's will and Babies

What an incredible week. I can't even describe it. This is a picture of Jenny, Jace, and little baby Joshua!

My sister had a baby two days ago, and I got to watch. It was quite the process to get here (Maryland), but I made it back all the same! I even had about 7 hours to spare when I got here. Jenny's labor was about 21 hours long. She was exhausted to say the very least at the end. I know a lot of people think it's gross, but I really can't even describe to you what a miracle it is to see. I know it was exceeding painful, but I don't think I have ever had such a desire to have children and a family of my own, haha. Just watching Jenny and Jace together, and watching them hold their first little baby for the very first time. All the pain and suffering sort of melted away and she held her little baby Joshua. Oh my goodness, he is so cute! They are such amazing people. It was a little scary for a bit. When he was first born he wouldn't breath. He went without breathing for about 2 whole minutes. He is ok, they just had to show him how. : )

Other than the whole baby thing, life has been pretty wonderful. It's been hard, but wonderful. This past weekend with my sister and Jace was such an encouragement. I can't imagine what my life would be like without them. More and more, I am thinking about what I am going to be doing next year. I feel like I have been asking myself the wrong questions for a long time. So many people are always concerned about knowing God's will. Don't get me wrong, that's important, but it never had been like this before. People didn't used to have choices like we have. The picked an husband or wife from the dozen or so they had to choose from in their town. They worked for their families and supported them and cared for them. I am thankful that I have so many choices! But that also makes things much harder. I think it is so easy for people to be back and fourth about what the will of God is. They say that God called them to work for a year, then to Africa for a year, then China, then home to get married, then to marry someone, then God's will changes and you don't think it is to marry someone, then it is to move back to Indiana after you get married. I mean, I know all of those things can happen, but I feel like it is unlikely. I had a couple really good talks with Jenny and Jace about it this past weekend, and I am reading and amazing book called "Just Do Something: A Liberating Approach to Finding God's Will" by Kevin DeYoung. I feel like we are all just asking ourselves the wrong questions. Instead of being like, "well, I will just do this for a little while" or "who knows, I will do this while a wait to find out what God's will is." I think the questions should be, what can I do right now that is ultimately going to serve the kingdom in the most effective way possible. I know most people are probably most effective if they keep their feet planted, build into something, and see what doors the Lord opens from there. I don't know what I am going to do next year, but I feel like I am looking at it differently than I have been in the past. I have had a bit of an off year, and I don't know if I feel like it is wise for me to teach others next year. I have never been in a place where I just felt like I was growing and being challenged all the time. When I talked to Jace about it, he was really great. He told me he thought I should either move to Asia or move somewhere were I knew I could grow and be poured into. He sees a lot of wisdom in growing first, but it's also pretty obvious that I have a heart for the nations as well. God often uses the weak to lead the strong. We'll see. I just know once I make the decision all my heart is going into it.

I feel so blessed right now. Praise God, for He is so good my friends.

Painting Picture of Egypt

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